ERETM4 :: 03. Body Reclamation
Embodied Relating Exploring Trauma and how it impacts our relationships series
What makes you come alive? What keeps you going ? Is there hope in your heart still or has the weariness of the world attached itself to you like a limpet leaving you afraid and passionless? Do you wake up with a smile and stars in your eyes after restless, feverish soul-searching in the night? Do you dream, dream beyond what is possible and beyond the narrow confines of your jaded existence? How old do you feel? How much in love can you fall? How much step is there in your dance, o how many notes left in your song ? Have you decided to sit by and watch others dance or weep at the dying notes of your own swan song?
Shake your lethargy. Come alive to innocence once more. Believe past your own jaded cynicism. Pretend you are young once more. Jump up with a spring in your feet, fall breathlessly in love again. Let the colors of the world wash over your walls, brushing the greys away. Let the sunlight of hope flood through your doubting self, o let the music play.
Dance till you ache and drop, laugh till you cry. Sing till your lungs burst, and journey till the very road ends and dream by the moonless starless nights. Sleep with a secret smile on your lips, your body flush with the imprints of lips. Come alive, my dearest ...reclaim yourself from the living dead.
Life beckons. ~Srividya Srinivasan
What is Body Reclamation
We live in a society that tells us, in many overt and subtle ways, that our physical bodies are not our own. Capitalism encourages the objectification and comodification of our bodies and places value only on bodies that can be and are productive. Those of us who were socialized as female as children were often taught that our value is based on how we can serve others in one one way or another.
When we add personal trauma into the mix of our socialization, we learn from a very young age that our body is not ours, that we don't know our own body best (doctors, caregivers, others in authority do), that we do not have the right to say no to our body being touched, fed, used for work, etc.
Body reclamation is the work of undoing all of this conditioning and teaching our internal systems that our body is in fact OURS. As we do the work of physical reclamation, this often has a ripple effect into the rest our lives, giving us space to be better at knowing our boundaries and defending them, helping us slow down from automatic reactions into more thoughtful and intentional responses to activating situations, and helping us grow our own autonomy and agency and understanding the importantce of both interdependence and our own sense self not dependent on another, as well as how to trust our own body and its senstations and messages to us.
Body reclamation work also assists with development of our clare senses. It helps to shift our nervous system and mind from being totally defended and blocked to being more open and able to receive physiological sensory, as well as “extra” sensory ques and stimulation. None of this happens overnight, it is an ongoing pratice that expands and contracts, just and we, and our healing, do.
Given the current state (2025) of the US politically, I feel this work of embodiment and body reclamation is all the more vital for our growth and healing, individually and collectively.
Body Reclamation Exercise
Basic: Begin by gently tapping, tracing, squeezing, or simply resting your right hand on the palm of your left hand with the fingers of your right. Notice how this sensation feels in the palm of your hand for a moment. Next, while continuing your touch your left hand with your right, look at the palm of your left hand, and say to yourself (out loud or in your head) "This is my left hand. This is the palm of my left hand. This is MY left hand being touched by my right hand."
Now, pause for a moment (stop touching) and notice what you feel physically as well as psychologically and emotionally. Do you feel tingly, or vibrate-y? Do you feel numb? Hot or cold? Do you feel anxious? Sad? Annoyed? Simply notice what you are feeling in this moment.
Next, turn your hand over and begin tapping/squeezing/holding/touching the back of your left hand. Notice how it feels for a moment and then again say "This is my left hand. This is the back of my left hand. This is MY left hand being touched by my right hand." After saying those words (out loud or in your head), stop tapping and again notice how you are feeling, emotionally, physically, and psychologically.
Now, repeat the above with your right hand.
Continue by choosing another part of your body: lower and upper arms, crook of elbow, shoulders, neck, feet, legs, face, abdomen, etc. Each time, while touching and looking at the body part, verbally claim it as yours. I recommend doing no more than three body parts in any one sitting.
Note: You may want to do this exercise by starting only with your hands and stopping. Notice how you are feeling. If you are beginning to feel overwhelmed or flooded, stop, do some nervous system soothing (getting a glass of water always seems to help with this particularly) and come back to the exercise in a few hours or the next day.
For those with chronic pain and for whom the actual tapping of your body may be too physically painful try the following modifications instead. It is most important that you do what feels good and right for your body while doing the hard work of noticing and reclaiming.
Body Reclamation Exercise Modification 1
Instead of touching, simply look at your body part and say the words of reclaiming, again either out loud or inside your head.
Body Reclamation Exercise Modification 2
Instead of actually touching your skin/body, tap just above it.
Stream of Conscious Writing Prompts
What are your thoughts on the idea of reclaiming your body as yours?
In what ways have you been taught that your body is not yours?
What messaging did your receive as a child about whether or not you know your own body best (i.e. were you told you always had to "clean your plate" even when you were full, were you told something “didn’t hurt” when you were in fact in pain, etc)?
In looking at your own socialization, who (other than you) claimed they knew your body best/more than you?
What would it mean to you to learn to trust your body?
This is content from a series of multiple three week modules I offered in 2022. Each three week grouping has an overall general theme, but all weeks can be stand-alone information and practices for you. As always, take what resonates and leave the rest.
This is the final content from this series. I will be taking a two week break from sharing this kind of content so I can decide what to share here next.
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