Expansion, contraction

When we are deep in the work of unraveling our internalized narratives around relationships (like what defines a “relationship,” what our relationships “should” look like, how other people “should” act “if they love us,” etc), a vital part of the process is getting quiet with ourselves, checking in with our body, mind, and heart to feel out where we are at, what we want, what we need, and how that may have changed over time.

A thing is, our wants and needs do change over time, because we change. As we do our trauma work, learn to express and defend our boundaries, connect with our body, and learn to acknowledge and explore our actual wants, we find ourselves showing up differently in our relationships, including our relationship with our Self. This showing up differently often means no longer tolerating things you may have in the past. It also means having a deeper connection to our wants, desires, and needs as well as having the resources to get these met and having the discernment t…