ERETM1 :: 01. Trauma Bonding

Embodied Relating : Exploring trauma & how it impacts our relationships series - Module 1

We begin this module by exploring trauma bonds :: what they are, how we recognize them, how to break them.

What is a trauma bond?

From this article:

"Trauma bonding is a psychological response to abuse. It occurs when the abused person forms an unhealthy bond with the person who abuses them.

The person experiencing abuse may develop sympathy for the abusive person, which becomes reinforced by cycles of abuse, followed by remorse. Stockholm syndrome is one type of trauma bonding."

We are susceptible to trauma bonding when we grew up with primary caregivers who were abusive, either physically, emotionally, or psychologically. As children who experienced abuse or neglect from our primary caregivers, the people who we relied on for our survival, we grew neural pathways that tell us people who love us cause us harm. As children we needed to believe that our abusers loved us (and likely they did, but not in the ways we needed as children) because our survival depended on then.

When we become adu…