Being alone together and apart

A short note

Sometimes we just need space, and at the same time don’t want to be alone.

Being alone together with a person I feel safe and comfortable to do so with is one of my greatest pleasures.

Like leave me the fuck alone, don’t talk to me or touch me, you do your own thing and I’ll do mine but let’s do that in the same room.

Sometimes I need solitude and don’t want to be sharing space (physical, mental, or emotional) with anyone.

Having people in our lives who get this, respect it, honor it, and aren’t offended by it is one of the greatest gifts and intimacies I have ever known.

Autonomy is vital in our relationships. All our relationships. Our separateness is what allows the deepest depths of intimacy because we know we won’t be swallowed whole and that we are not expected to take on the pains and burdens of another, while being able to be in a space of intense interconnection and supporting each other.

Finding those who understand and can do it is as rare as it is magical and beautiful.